


The Vivarium

by thetreesgrowodd



Category: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles - All Media Types
Genre: Drug-Induced Sex, Humiliation, Imprisonment, Isolation, M/M, POV Raphael, Rape/Non-con Elements, Turtle Anatomy, Turtlecest, Voyeurism, in various combinations, other pairings not listed to avoid spoilers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-01-09
Updated: 2015-08-15
Packaged: 2018-03-06 19:55:01
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 10
Words: 16,539
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3146633
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thetreesgrowodd/pseuds/thetreesgrowodd
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Raphael's attempt to find his abducted brothers leads to him getting captured too.</p><p>Isolated and unable to communicate with them, Raph is forced to watch the shocking things his brothers do while they're on display in their extravagant cell, an artificial tropical paradise.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. An Artificial Paradise

It was just supposed to be a fucking scouting mission.

He'd only come to check the place out because Casey heard a rumor on the street that some kind of weird creatures were being held here in this building. Because for 27 days now, Raphael's brothers had been missing — gone without a trace. The place was a swanky office building and didn't seem a likely place to hold mutant turtles — it had seemed like just another in a string weak leads, but Raph had followed every single one desperately and he sure wasn't giving up now.

So Raph and April came to check it out — just to check it out, and see if it was worth coming back with Casey to break in. And it had all gone wrong. Raph hadn't even been reckless or impulsive — he'd been a perfectly stealthy ninja. Getting seen had just been bad luck, pure and simple. And once they were spotted... well, the number of security goons and the kinds of weapons they had were completely insane. Tranq guns — to protect an _office building_? Who even _had_ tranq guns?!

Now he was doped up from whatever they'd shot him with, feeling himself stumbling and fucking _floating_ all at once, being pulled across the lobby of the building. Hands tied, ankles hobbled, neck in a choke chain, sais gone, and surrounded by at least a dozen guys with guns. Big guys. With big guns.

And yet, if they didn't have that gun to April's head, he'd fight. But they kept her far enough away that he wouldn't reach her in time even if he did break free. So he walked, head fuzzy, limbs feeling too far away, and he giggled — giggled! — when they threatened him. He rode the elevator up with them. There weren't even numbered buttons for the floors — just a keycard reader.

They led him and April out into a huge room, all marble and glass, polished metal, high ceilings, fancy lighting. Somebody had way too much money. From a mezzanine above them, some guy in an ugly suit watched them as if he were a king. Head honcho, then. And yet, Raph had no clue who he was.

"So, I now have the complete set," the man said.

Raph's dulled mind tried to make sense of that comment. Complete set? Did that mean —?

One of the goons snapped several photos of Raph, the flashes of light like slaps to his face. Raph growled and struggled against his restraints. Prior to today, Raph could count the number of photos taken of him in his entire life on one hand, what with living in secrecy and shadows and all. And he'd never had flash photography taken before. Dammit, it really did leave purple blobs in his vision, just like people said.

"Yes, the others of your kind are here," Ugly Suit Man continued. "Tell me — what do you think of my vivarium?"

"Well, I dunno what that is, but... I'll like it better after I shove it up your asshole," Raph said.

"Perhaps a closer look will help you understand." The man smiled, unruffled. "Constructing it has been an enormous undertaking, but I'm quite pleased with it. However, there was always a sense of something missing, some loose end. Then I realized what the problem was — you remaining at liberty. Well, now that's resolved."

And they forced Raph forward again, toward some kind of massive glass wall that was partitioning off part of the room. No — there were four glass walls, enclosing a large area... Raph had never been to an aquarium, only seen them on tv, but this had to be as massive as any of the tanks they had. It was at the very heart of the building, like a courtyard, and looking up, Raph could see rows of windows on the floors above overlooking it and bridge-like walkways that crossed over it.

There was sunlight filtering in from above. Raph wondered if the tranquilizers were seriously messing up his perception of time — because it had to still be night out — but decided it was a neat trick from some kind of lighting hidden far above. Raph could have sworn it stood under a huge skylight at noon. The light refracted and shimmers danced with shadows on the walls. The glass structure was full of clear water and and had a rocky island at its center, complete with vegetation, a sandy beach and even a waterfall, all contained within the glass. It was deep, too — the water level was about at mid-chest to Raph where he stood, but he could see glimpses of lit rooms through the other sides of the tank, far below the water and going several floors down below the one they were on.

It was beautiful and unbelievably extravagant. Raph's gut churned as he began to get vague ideas about what all of this might have to do with him.

Something seemed to be disturbing the water, something more than the waterfall. A person was in the water, making it ripple against the side. The security guys ahead had paused with April as she stared at it, as if confused. Well, so was Raph. One figure in the water — no two, there were four legs treading water. Green legs.

His brothers, of course. Without their gear and looking thinner than normal. One in front braced against a rock, another right behind him, against his shell.

Raph stared stupidly. He should be relieved to see his brothers alive after a month of not knowing, but he wasn't. Something was very wrong here, something was very wrong with _them_. They weren't reacting to the group watching them, or even looking at anyone outside of the glass, as if oblivious to them. But more than that — why were they moving like that? Were they fighting? Wrestling with each other? No. Raph knew how his brothers moved, and this wasn't it. Those thrusting motions — this was —

Then all at once he understood.

One of the goons yanked on his neck chain, forcing Raph forward and down. Now he could see exactly what was happening under the water. Mike was exposed and hard. Leo was behind him... shoving himself into Mike with slow, even strokes. Above water, Mike's head lolled as if in dreamy pleasure, and Leo's eyes were slitted and glittering.

Fucking. They were _fucking_.

And there, further back, was Don, blending in somewhat with the greens and browns of the plants on the shore, only a hint of movement giving him away. He was equally naked and exposed, hand moving on himself as he lazily watched Leo and Mike.

April made a choking sound as she, too, realized what was happening. The guards around her snickered.

Raph stared stupidly. He'd never seen his brothers fucking before — at least _not with his eyes open_. It was something he never thought he would see. Something impossible. It couldn't really happen.

Raph laughed then, a long slow laugh, one that started deep in his chest and rumbled its way up and out, as deep and racking and uncontrollable as a cough during a chest cold. And then, just like a coughing fit, he couldn't stop. It sounded insane, even to his own ears. It fed into itself, it grew. His own laughter scared him — but _nothing_ scared him, and that didn't make any sense so he laughed even harder. The men laughed with him.

It wasn't funny. _Fucking drugs_. His brothers were captured, locked up and on display against their will... and were spending their time screwing each other.

"This?! This is your torture?" Raph asked, sarcastically, when he was able to get the words out, flinging a hand in his brothers' direction.

"Exactly."

And then, despite the chains and guns, despite the danger to April, Raph completely lost his grip on himself. If he'd had any rational thought left in him, he'd have been embarrassed. He'd have remembered that he was in danger and that to lose his cool put him at a disadvantage. But all he felt was the rage and the desire to give himself over to it.

He crazily flung himself at the glass, bounced off, growled and raged and threw himself at the goons. He was clumsy from the drugs, stumbling on his own feet, and couldn't even knock them down. They just pushed him away. They stopped laughing, though, and that was something. Raph kept coming back for more, falling, flailing, trying to head-butt them, frothing at the mouth with his string of curses and screaming.

April cried out his name several times, but Raph was too far gone. He could only vaguely hear what was going on around him. Ugly Suit Man told the guards to get Raph under control, and they closed in on all sides and pushed him down on the ground. Raph found himself on his knees, face pressed against the cool glass by the hired muscle. The chain around his neck had been yanked so tight he could only wheeze.

People were talking and it some of it seemed to be directed at him, but he didn't hear it. The adrenalin wore off and Raph went limp and weak. He didn't even care. Everything else faded away completely and his world shrank down to himself and his brothers. He watched them, suspended in the water above, Leo still thrusting in and out of Mike.

And the expressions on their faces. They loved it. Leo, in particular, looked far happier than Raph had ever seen him.


	2. Drugged

Raph woke up with what felt like a hangover. His head throbbed and felt fuzzy. When he opened his eyes, he saw the glass wall of the tank in front of his face. That brought it all back, although he felt too disoriented and in pain to make much sense of things.

Where was he? He was too groggy to even sit up and look around. Was he locked in with his brothers in that huge glass enclosure? In the — what had the guy called it? — the _vivarium_? What the fuck was that anyway, some fancy word for aquarium?

But, no, he wasn't inside of it, because that was carpet under his cheek. From what he could see, he was in another room in the building, with a single giant window that just _looked into_ the vivarium. He was still separated from his brothers.

Raph heard movement behind him, and even though he knew that he was in enemy territory and it might be a matter of life and death, he couldn't make himself turn to see what it was. He was so drowsy he was nearly asleep...

...

Raph drifted back later. He didn't exactly feel better, but he was more alert. He raised himself up to his elbows, then froze there and moaned softly, trying to breathe deeply and evenly as pain and nausea flared up in response to his movement. They passed eventually, and he got to his knees. He was unchained, but he could still feel where the chains had bruised him. He had no sense of how much time had passed. The sunlight shining into the glass enclosure from above made it seem like day, but he knew that it might be fake, just an effect caused by special lights.

He turned his head to look at the room he was in. It wasn't the big, open room he'd been in before. This looked like part of an office. Maybe a meeting room? High ceilings, a big table with chairs, a pitcher of water and some cups, a large flat screen built into the wall, and no windows to the outside — just that one whole wall that was solid glass, part of the side of the huge vivarium. Yeah, because what meeting was complete without a view of mutant turtles, swimming and frolicking in their (un)natural environment?

April was in one of the chairs with her head resting on her arms on the table, asleep. She didn't seem to be harmed or injured. Raph was glad she was safe. He realized suddenly that he had absolutely no idea what to say to her — not after what they'd seen. Raph generally liked to act as if he never felt shame or embarrassment — but the truth was, deep down, he did sometimes, but he could just usually ignore it or squash it. But this — seeing his brothers exposed, seeing them doing _that_... Raph cringed.

That _has_ been real, hadn't it? Not a dream? Because it just seemed too _impossible_ to have been real...

He needed to focus. The important thing right now was getting out of here. Raph scanned the room for any possible weapons or escape routes. The door was shut and had no handle or lock on this side. Aside from the chairs and table, there wasn't anything else in the room. They must have taken everything away. The air vents — the old favorite of thieves and spies and anyone needing to get around large buildings in movies — were far too small to crawl into, even for someone without a shell, but there were also a whole hell of a lot of them. Every few feet along the top of the wall there was another small grate. That was weird — or was it? Raph wasn't exactly an expert on what the inside of office buildings were like.

Raph stood slowly, one hand to the glass to steady himself. With his eyes above the water line, he could see his brothers now, sunning themselves on the island. They weren't doing anything lewd at the moment, although none of them had bothered to tuck themselves away.

A wave of relief washed over him and he leaned against the glass. At least they were alive and apparently healthy. _Maybe a little too healthy_ , Raph thought, with a twisted sense of humor. But not dead. Not in some dark dungeon. Not in pieces and dumped in a pit to rot.

Don, the closest, was lounging on the sand. His body was wet, glistening, as if he'd just come out of the water. He turned toward Raph and made eye contact. Raph felt a glimmer of hope.

Gracefully, Don got into the water and swam right over to the glass, pressing his hands against it. Up close, it was obvious he'd lost some muscle mass. Weren't they training or sparring at all? Even though they were imprisoned, Raph knew his brothers well enough to know they wouldn't just give that up. Would they? Don watched him through the glass with curious, but blank eyes, treading water.

Don... Don wasn't _right_. He should be trying to communicate with Raph. He should be embarrassed that he was exposed. There should be a gleam of intelligence in his eyes — or at least an _expression_ on his face. But he was just staring. Raph touched the glass and Don mirrored him sliding his hand to match Raph's position on the other side.

"Donnie," Raph whispered.

"Raph?" April's voice came from behind him.

Raph jumped, feeling like he'd been caught doing something bad. Now that she was awake, he could see just how red and swollen her eyes were. "What's wrong with them?" He demanded, loud and angry to disguise how uncomfortable he felt. His hands curled into fists against the glass.

"I think they must be drugged," April said. She had that tone in her voice — absolute calm. People got like that around Raph when they thought he was about to start shouting. Why would she think that? Oh. The muscles in his arms were shaking as he pressed his fists hard against the side of the tank. He tried to relax them.

"Drugged?" Raph asked, trying to stay calm, trying to focus on her.

"It's the only thing that makes sense. At first I wondered if it was one-way glass, you know." Nervously, April tucked a lock of hair behind her ear. "That maybe they didn't realize anyone could see _in_ because they couldn't see _out_. So if they thought no one was watching... if they thought they had privacy and um... were just..."

And _what_? Just felt like having sex with each other while locked in an enemy's prison? "No! No, no, _no_. They wouldn't—! They don't—!"

"Right." April said, quickly. "I mean, I didn't really think that. Anyway they can definitely see _us_ , so that's not it."

"Of course not!" Raph said, heatedly.

"They must be drugged with something that's making them act that way. Maybe it's in the water in there," April said. "Which reminds me — see those vents?" She looked up at all the funny vents around the ceiling. "I think they pumped some kind of gas into the air in here earlier to put us to sleep."

"They did? Shit. Is that why I feel so hungover? I don't even remember how we got in here," Raph muttered.

"You were still pretty wobbly from the tranquilizer dart they'd hit you with earlier when they brought us in here, then—" She looked back at Raph, then quickly turned her head away, with a funny expression. She was blushing.

What was it? Raph hadn't done anything so — _something behind Raph_ —

Raph turned, with a feeling of dread, to look at what was behind him. Don, inside the tank, was now grinding against the glass. He had a look of simple-minded confusion on his face, as if unsure why he and Raph weren't actually touching.

"God!" Raph pushed himself away from the glass. "Fuck! _Donnie_!" He took a few quick steps backwards, toward the table. The movement made his headache pound again, and Raph slumped into a chair, holding his head in both hands. "Oh fuck, my head hurts."

"Raph. Raph, you ok?" April's hands touched his shoulders, but Raph couldn't look at her. "Here, let me get you some water."

While she was pouring the water, Raph snuck a sideways look at Don, who was still rubbing against the glass, staring intently at Raph with a creepy half-grin on his face. Another expression he never thought he would see on Don's face. Raph would have shuddered if his head didn't hurt so much.

The screen on the wall flickered on then, and Raph and April looked up at it in surprise to see the man in the ugly suit — the Head Honcho himself — on the screen. "Enjoying yourselves? Or maybe you'd prefer a change of rooms? I do like to see that my guests are content. Wouldn't you like to be enjoying yourself as much as they are?"

Raph rose to his feet in anger, but immediately got lightheaded and saw stars. He thought it was just from his hangover, until April asked, "What's that?" and Raph noticed the faint hiss of air coming from the vents all around them.

"I was planning on adding you to my collection in the vivarium right away," the man's voice continued. "But then I started thinking... maybe we could wait a little while. There's something to be said for delayed gratification. The build-up. The anticipation. The eventual release..."

Raph just had time to see April slump to the floor before he passed out too.


	3. Room #1

When Raph woke (once again feeling horribly sluggish and sick) he was alone in a different room. This was smaller, more like a hotel room than the conference room he had been in before, but stripped down to almost nothing — a mattress on the floor, no furniture, not even a bed frame. They must have known he could use anything as a weapon — not that he had anyone to use a weapon _on_.

 _Yet_. But he would. He'd make sure of that.

As in the other room, a full wall was a glass window looking into the tank that held his brothers. The bottom third or so of the window was under the waterline. It was near the island — and that's where the three of them were.

Don had apparently fallen asleep on top of Mike on the sandy strip of beach. No need to guess at what they had been doing before.

It was Leo that really caught Raph's attention, though. He was sitting on a narrow rock that rose up out of the surface of the water near the window, balancing there with such a calm look on his face that Raph could almost believe he was just meditating, not drugged. Raph willed Leo to open his eyes, to acknowledge him, but Leo never so much as twitched. _Stubborn bastard_.

Raph got up with a sigh to check the room over more closely.

The first thing he noticed was that those same air vents were up at the top of the walls. The enemy could knock him out at any time without even being in the room. That was _fucking cheating_.

The door had no handle or hinges on the inside, and it also felt really solid. Raph had lost count of the number of doors he'd kicked down or broken open in his life (whatever the number was, it was a lot, and certainly the majority of them had been in circumstances that Leonardo wouldn't have approved of had he known of them). By now, Raph knew how to tell when a door was going to give — and this one _wasn't_. No point wasting any more time there. Anyway, escaping by the door would have been too easy.

He found some grocery bags on the floor against a wall. Bottled water, power bars, trail mix, jerky. Toilet paper. Double rolls. A 24 pack. Fuck. They planned on him being here for a while.

The bathroom was in the corner. The top of the toilet tank, toilet seat and lid were all gone, and the towel racks and shower curtain rod had been removed. Even the shower head was gone, leaving just a pipe sticking out of the wall. There was nothing left that Raph could wrench off and bust his way out of the room with, nothing he could use as a weapon to do life-altering damage to anyone standing between himself and his brothers.

With nothing to do, Raph turned his attention back to the window. The light over the tank was fading through a bright simulated sunset. Raph (who had seen a few real, smog-free sunsets at the farmhouse) could tell it was a decent imitation. It bathed him a reddish light, and backlit the familiar forms of his brothers.

Raph curled up on the floor, watching Leo who was still perched on his rock. For weeks — _weeks_ — Raph had searched for them. Now here they were, and he couldn't even talk to them. He couldn't even make sure they were ok.

Raph sat there as the fake sunset faded and it got dark inside the vivarium, with just a few dim lights above. There were some lit windows of rooms like his on the far side of the tank, some above the waterline and some below. Fuck, did every room in this place have a view of the tank? Raph didn't switch on the lights in his room, though. He felt safer in the dark. The dim greenish-blue glow of light coming through the water of the vivarium was calming.

_Alive. They're alive. They're alive. They're together and healthy and in one piece. Alive._

But what did it mean about them that the minute they were drugged and locked up, all they did was fuck each other senseless?

Leo stirred finally. He eased himself down from his rock and treaded water there, staring back at Raph in the dim light for an intense moment. Raph could almost sense Leo reaching out with his senses, trying to understand things in spite of his drugged state. But his face remained blank, and he eventually turned away from Raph.

Raph watched as Leo went back to the shore and knelt by his sleeping brothers and then — like it was nothing — took his cock in his hand and butted the head against Mike's face until he opened his mouth. Raph wasn't even sure if Mike was fully awake. Don, still half on top of Mike, gave Leo a curious glance, then sleepily put his head back down again.

Raph stared, disturbed. He couldn't think of an action that was less like Leo — to force himself on a sleeping Mikey like it was _normal_ — and yet, just watching them was making Raph hard in spite of himself.

The three of them hadn't been having sex behind his back for years... had they? _What if they had_? It was a bullshit question, but the way they were with each other just seemed so relaxed and casual. If anything like that had been going on back at the lair, Raph would have known about it, or at least suspected something... wouldn't he?

But he hadn't. Raph had never had reason to wonder if his brothers were screwing each other before, and they certainly had never acted like they were interested in _him_. He'd never given it a thought before... at least, not _realistically_. He'd had his share of fantasies, that was for sure, about all kinds of partners. Human women, human men, females of his own kind, males of his own kind — whatever fit his mood. And yes, that included his brothers sometimes. Maybe some people would say that was wrong, but Raph didn't care. It was _hot_ , and he kept it secret, and it wasn't hurting anyone.

He had fantasized about walking in on Don testing out a sex machine he'd secretly built, or Mike being so caught up in playing with himself that he didn't care that Raph could see him, or Leo... so horny but so uptight, stuck between the demands of his body and his own rigid personality, needing Raph to take control and relieve the pressure...

Yeah, alright. Ok. So he'd fuck his brothers, given the chance — at least in his fantasies.

He just never thought they would too.


	4. Blue Twilight

Days passed, and Raph fell into regular habits. He slept during the day — or at least, when the "sun" was out. He slept deeply, losing entire days to it. He was paying the price for not taking care of himself while his brothers had been missing. He'd been averaging 4 hours per night during that time, and now exhaustion was catching up to him. Hunger was too, and he longed for a real hot meal instead of the packaged snacks he had.

During the month he had been searching for his brothers, Raph's meals had been quick and basic — eating unheated soup from a can, spreading peanut butter on bread and slapping another slice on top, hating the effort of preparing anything. If he and Casey were out searching, a greasy burger and fries in a paper bag with transparent spots from the grease, eaten quickly on a rooftop or alley. A month of not knowing, a month of eating while feeling like he'd rather throw up just for the release. Eating so he could go on and check the next alley. They had to be somewhere, alive or...

Going home was rough. It was too quiet in the lair. It wasn't right. When Raph couldn't take it anymore, he had moved to Casey's apartment, and neither April nor Casey had asked why. But as terrible as being there alone had been, Raph had been glad Master Splinter hadn't been alive to see it. To see three of his sons missing, and then to have the fourth vanish like this... sitting in the lair, worrying, or searching for them frantically...

And there they were, locked up here in the tank, looking ridiculously like... like a _gay mutant porno postcard_ , with the beach and the palm trees and the blue water, for fuck's sake.

When it was dark, Raph curled up in the corner by the glass, watching his brothers, while hours passed by in a numb blue twilight. He thought, he dozed, he got up to use the bathroom or to eat only when his body screamed at him with the need.

The only interruption to his routine were the _rages_.

The rages. Horrible, out-of-control, violent outpouring of emotions that only ended when Raph was too exhausted to go on. They left him aching and sore and battered... and didn't do a goddam thing to change the situation. He threw himself against the door, kicked and hit the walls and vents, flung himself against the glass, and no matter how frantic or angry he got, he couldn't break anything _but himself_. You'd think he'd get that through his head — but it was pretty thick, apparently. He hadn't cracked it yet.

Sitting and feeling the warning signs of a rage coming on was a misery. The moods and thoughts that led up to one, the storm clouds that gathered in his head, listening to the thunder and just wanting the fucking rain to start so it would be over with sooner.

The aftermath — the bruises, the exhaustion, the moments of accepting that he could do absolutely nothing to change things — was a horrible relief. Because he had found some kind of release, at least.

A relief, a release... Maybe, in some fucked-up way, that was why his brothers were screwing each other. They were prisoners as much as he was, after all. Maybe even more, because they were clearly under the influence of some kind of drugs. Their minds weren't even free.

Raph hoped April was safe. Through the water, all the way across on the other side of the tank, he could make out the shapes of many other windows both above and below the water. Some were long, and he could sometimes see vague groups of people walking along behind them — hallways, possibly? But most seemed to be smaller rooms like the one he was in. April was probably in one of them. But he couldn't see more than shadows through them, so he had no idea where she was. When his brothers swam past the other windows, they never paid them any attention. Maybe she was there, but they no longer recognized her...

But they knew Raph. They clustered around _his_ window. If April were out there, scanning the windows around the vivarium just like he was, she'd know which one was Raph's just by how much time the other three turtles spent around it. When they weren't underwater, pressed against the glass, they often sat on the island and watched him. While they were having sex, even...

And Raph couldn't take his eyes off of them, not even then. Sometimes, in spite of it all, he got so hard watching them... But he wouldn't jack off right there in front of them. He couldn't. He always retreated to the bathroom first.

Leo in particular spent a lot of time staring in at Raph from his pinnacle of rock. His eyes were dark. His expression was placid and blank. What was he thinking? Or was it just curiosity without any real thought or recognition behind it?

Would they ever be normal again, even if they escaped? Could they go back, unchanged and undamaged, to the life they'd had before? 

Raph would rather be mindless, like them. Locked in that fucking jar with them, instead of being alone here, worrying. It would be easier —

No — _no_ — he'd never give in to the enemy like that. He'd rip that bastard's head off before he'd give in — he was itching to do it —

Except when he _wanted_ to be in there with them.

Sometimes when he couldn't take it, when his head felt like it was going to explode, Raph retreated in the only way he could. By curling up in the bathtub for a while. With or without water — it didn't matter.

But there was nothing to do there. There was nothing to do at all. The boredom was almost the worst part of it. So he watched his brothers. They swam around a lot, deep underwater. Water was their element, and Raph had never really thought about it before. They could stay completely submerged for ten or fifteen minutes easily without wanting to go to the surface for air — and longer, if they needed to. Watching them swim made him appreciate the way they moved in the water. It came so naturally. And when they came out of the water and lay on the sand, the light sand stuck to their skin and shells, creating a contrast.

Sunlight — although artificial — on his brothers' faces was mostly unfamiliar. But so was all of this. So was the long make-out session Leo and Don indulged in, bobbing in the water by Leo's rock. Don had swum out to where Leo was sitting and tugged at him, until Leo eased himself down into the water. Raph watched it all, the pink of their tongues standing out as flashes between the greens of their skin. It was oddly tender, with soft touches to each other's faces.

But still Raph was shocked by what they did, how horny they were. The whole time he'd been here, he hadn't once seen them without their cocks out. Sure, he'd fantasized about these kinds of things, and maybe he'd have liked it under the right circumstances, but these _weren't the right ones_. This wasn't how he'd wanted it to happen. That blank on Leo's face, the lack of intelligence in Don's expression, the dullness in Mike's eyes. They weren't themselves.

It was only right after they came that anything familiar showed in their eyes. Just a flash. When they looked at each other.

Raph had never felt so far on the outside. It was true that when he'd gotten to be a teenager, he'd turned into a loner. He'd separated himself from the group sometimes _by his own choice_ , but he'd never been excluded otherwise. Even during those years his temper was sharp and his words often stung those around him, he'd always been part of the family in all the ways that mattered. No, not just the family — he'd always been one of the turtles. The four of them had always had special bonds between them that not even Splinter had understood the depth of.

Then they'd disappeared, and Raph had gone through hell trying to find them, only to wind up like this. Never before had he been separated from his brothers, and certainly never for so long.

Never had three of them gone through such intense experiences without the fourth. It was unthinkable.

Who would have ever thought that Raph would be the only one who hadn't done the things his brothers were doing? Who would have thought they'd rack up so much sexual experience without him?

They were trying to include him, or so it seemed, but there wasn't much they could do with the glass between them. His brothers watched him hungrily. When he was near the glass, they moved their hands against the glass like they wanted to touch him. Mike pressed his face against it like a kid outside a candy shop.

It was one thing to see them humping each other at a distance — but they gave him a front seat to the show, fucking underwater right on the other side of his window. Raph could watch Don's finger moving in and out of Leo, or Mike's lips pursed tight as he went down on one of them, or the way Don touched his cloaca when it was swollen and open after sex as if amazed at the feeling. Raph saw it all from inches away. But what good was it? Watching was all he could do.

It was too much. _Too much_. It wore him down. No matter how many rages he went into or how often he hid himself away in the bathroom — the thought of them — the knowledge that they were there — ate away at him.

Late one night, when most of the lights in the other windows had gone out, with his brothers right against the glass, Raph pulled out his cock. Living in their sewer lair had never given them much privacy. With four teenage boys in a small space, you tended to accidentally walk in on each other sometimes. But Raph had never jacked off in front of them, not like this, not for an audience. But _fuck it — fuck it all_.

Raph spat in his palm and grasped himself. Their eyes moved with his hand, as if mesmerized, while Raph jerked himself hard and fast. On the other side, Leo mirrored him perfectly. Mike swam lower to get a closer look at what Raph was doing... his mouth falling open a moment later as Don grabbed his shell and penetrated him, watching Raph over Mike's shoulder, his eyes half-lidded with pleasure. Don's thrusts matched Raph's pace — so did Leo's hand on himself.

It was... it was almost like he was with them.

Raph leaned forward — his forehead pressed against the glass, his mouth open wide — and came, leaving long while stripes on the glass. The sensation was almost intense enough to blot out the guilt.


	5. Breaking

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Note the warnings. This chapter has references to the idea of using rape to humiliate and punish, and some very dubious consent. Raphael's thoughts about consent are unhealthy and messed up in a lot of ways.

Time passed in a blur. The days and nights all blended together. The pile of food and bottled water was getting smaller, but nothing else changed. There had to be a way to escape, but Raph couldn't find it, and he thought he was starting to go insane.

When Raphael's mind was cool and calm enough (usually in the bathtub) he thought about the building and the man behind it all. It was an office building — it was where he did business, wasn't it? Why had he built the vivarium here? Had Raph and his brothers really earned such a reputation among the criminals of New York that they were worth putting on display as trophies? Had they pissed him off so badly that he would go to these extremes for revenge? But how could that be when Raph didn't even know who he was?

Or were they just here as a kind of freak show? Was he keeping them here like they were nothing more than exotic pets on display, like those rich idiots you hear about sometimes who keep lions and tigers like they're kitty cats? And then there was the sex, which was happening for everyone to see as well. Was it a kinky thing, something he got off on? Did he drug them specifically so that they would have sex? Or was he just drugging them to keep them calm and weak, and the sex was a side effect? Was it possible (and it gave Raph a heady, gut-churning sensation to think about it) that the drugs just lowered their inhibitions, like alcohol but much stronger, and let them act on a desire that was already there? Something that had been sleeping inside of them all along?

He couldn't figure it out. Shit. Maybe with Leo's logic, Mikey's way of understanding people, and Don's brains they could all figure it out together. But he didn't have them.

One purpose of the vivarium was crystal clear — _punishment_. Not just for his brothers, but also for people. From time to time, humans were put in there too. Terrified, naked humans. They'd fall (usually screaming, so Raph assumed they had been pushed) from above and plunge into the deep water. They usually tried hiding behind rocks or swimming to the far corners of the tank, obviously afraid that the turtles would catch them and would do to them _what they did to each other_.

But each time, the turtles just looked up with vaguely curious expressions from whatever they were doing, then ignored the humans. Still, that didn't make the humans any less afraid. They shook and cried and hid for hours. Eventually an open metal cage was lowered down for them to climb into and they were lifted back out.

It was pretty sick, threatening your enemies or whoever else got on your bad side with being sexually assaulted by mutants (Raph knew that his brothers must look like the stuff of nightmares to them), even if the turtles never actually did anything to them. Raph wasn't sure if the Ugly Suit Man really wanted or expected it to happen, or if the terror and humiliation was enough of a punishment. 

Because, clearly, turtles were only interested in turtles. That meant the only one they wanted was Raph.

And Raph was probably the only idiot in the entire world who actually wanted to be put in there with them.

...

Raph woke up, lying on the mattress in his room, feeling unusually groggy and confused. The room was completely dark, even though he usually slept when it was light. He didn't remember lying down. His head swam. It was like waking up after he'd been knocked out during a fight. But this was worse, because he couldn't even move — his arms and legs were limp and he had no strength at all. Clearly, he'd been gassed again, and not long ago since it hadn't worn off very much yet. 

And... someone was on top of him. Straddling him, hands roughly petting his plastron. Raph couldn't see who it was, as the room was darker than he'd ever seen it. But it was one of his brothers — Raph could feel his tail and shell against his thighs.

Then his brother leaned forward and nuzzled at Raph's cheek and jaw — and Raph felt his cock as well, hard and bumping against Raph's plastron with each movement.

Raph's eyes opened wide and his heart began to pound. He tried to raise his hand to touch his brother. He didn't even know what he was doing. Right or wrong — he didn't even understand the concepts at the moment. He was just reacting. Raising his arm a few inches was a struggle. His muscles shook and strained, then just wouldn't go any further. His arm dropped back to the mattress. _Shit_.

A moment later his brother leaned down completely, resting his weight Raph's body, plastron to plastron... and that was pretty fucking amazing and terrifying too.

"Leo?" Raph asked, his voice raspy.

There was no reply. But that wasn't surprising. Since he'd been here, Raph had never seen them talk to each other. He didn't think they could while they were drugged.

His brother smashed their mouths together, sloppily licking at him, and Raph opened his mouth automatically. It was a hard, intense, invasive kiss. An assault of a kiss, with his brother fucking his mouth with his tongue, pushing against him hard like it just wasn't enough. It was weird and wonderful.

Raph closed his eyes and let his confused feelings wash over him. Raph wanted more, but at the same time he wanted to get away. If he'd had control of his arms, he might have hit his brother. Or pulled him closer. _He needed it to stop. He needed it to go on. He needed to flip them over and be on top. He needed to hurt whoever had put them in here. He needed to stroke his brother's shell — and feel his cock in his hands. He wanted — he needed —_

His brother ground down against him, his cock between their plastrons. He let out small sounds of pleasure, and Raph finally knew who he was — Mikey. Mikey rubbing against him, Mikey kissing him. Raph somehow felt _right_ for the first time since his brothers had all gone missing. He felt like he was wanted. Like he belonged. Mikey communicated all of that without words.

Mikey let out a sigh of pleasure against Raph's mouth, then sat up and moved so he was kneeling next to him. He lifted Raph's legs, and Raph's cock slid out from the motion — he was _that_ hard. Mike's palm slid down its underside, then he pushed his finger Raph's cloaca, going deep.

Raph closed his eyes. He couldn't stop Mike if he wanted to. He honestly couldn't move. As much as he had always imagined himself being the aggressor — in his guilty fantasies, the one who pushed himself onto his hesitant or shy or innocent brothers, who taught them to feel pleasure and experience the sexual side of themselves for the first time (a fantasy that could never possibly play out in reality now, goddammit) he was surprised to find that he liked being passive. Mikey was in control, Mikey was the one with the experience, the one who knew what he wanted... and Raph would let him take what he wanted. He gave himself over to it.

They were part of someone else's game. Raph knew that. Someone wanted Mikey to force himself on Raph. They'd taken the ability to make the decision away from Mikey by drugging him, and they'd gassed Raph so he'd be weak and unable to stop Mikey, but the one thing they hadn't counted on was that Raph could still make the decision for himself — and right then, he decided to say _yes_. Not for the sick fucker who had captured and drugged them. Raph wouldn't do it for him — he wouldn't play that game. But he'd do it for Mikey. He'd be Mikey's plaything. Fuck _yes_.

"Yes. Yes. Do it, Mikey," Raph groaned. "Fucking do me."

With a savage grunt, Mikey dropped his head and took Raph into his mouth, while still working him with two fingers.

Raph let out a cry, and his brain checked out. But dimly, as if from far away, the thought came to him — _who knew what was going to happen tomorrow?_ They were prisoners. They might all get killed, or locked away from each other forever. This could be the last time Raph ever saw any of his brothers. The enemy who had captured them was powerful and had built a damn good prison for them. They had no control over their future.

But if the enemy thought for one second that he could use Mikey as a weapon to humiliate or terrorize Raph, then he was so fucking wrong. Because this was _Mikey_ , and, dammit, Raph _loved him_ , and this experience was between the two of them and no one else. Raph was determined to take from it only what he _wanted_ to take, and he was going to use all of his senses to experience every detail of it as fully as possible.

"Oh God, get on with it, Mikey. Fuck me. Fuck me, already!" Raph cried.

In a frenzy, Mike sat up and shoved Raph's knees up against his shoulders. Mikey got into position and lined them up, and —

A hissing noise came from the vents on the wall above them.

"No. No!" Raph shouted. But it was too late. He was already falling into darkness. The last thing he was aware of was Mike slumping onto him, unconscious.

...

Some time later, Raph woke on the mattress, once again groggy and weak as a kitten from being gassed. Twice in a day, _fuck_. Only this time he'd been able to sleep long enough for the effects to start to wear off. At least he could move now.

"Mikey?" he asked.

But the room was empty.

Raph stood on shaky legs and walked to the window. The dim nighttime lights were back on. All three of his brothers were on the island, sleeping.

Something inside of Raph built slowly as he stood and watched them. And then, all at once —

Raphael went into a rage. The worst one yet.

It didn't make him feel better, not this time. Nothing calmed the inferno. Not splitting his knuckles open against the glass, not seeing stars from banging his skull against the door, not the pain in his throat as he screamed until it was raw. He clawed up the carpet, ripped the mattress into shreds, threw his food and bottled water until they burst open.

He had to get out. _He had to_. The door was too strong and the glass was too thick, so that left — the wall. Raph rammed his shell against the wall repeatedly until the plaster cracked, then hit the weak spot until pieces started to fall off and a hole opened up. A tiny hole, with only darkness beyond. He pried at it and tried to widen it until his fingers were bloody. But it was tough, and for all that work it was only a few inches across.

When he slumped to the floor underneath the hole, amid bits of plaster and blood-smeared broken drywall, Raph thought it was from exhaustion. Then, over the pounding in his head, he heard it — the rush of gas through the vents. They were stopping him, gassing him again. He had pissed _them_ off for a change. Raph threw back his head and laughed, and everything went dark.


	6. Entertainment

Raphael woke in a different room, lying on a carpeted floor. Who had moved him, and how? He imagined the hired goons picking him up and dragging him around the building and shuddered at the thought of their hands on him.

That reminded him — his _hands_. He'd really messed them up when he tried to break out of his old room. Raph raised them to look at them. They were bandaged and wrapped in gauze and tape. Someone had taken care of them for him. Some of the smaller scrapes on his wrists had already scabbed and started to heal, and Raph wondered how long he'd been unconscious.

He turned his head to look around at the room. It wasn't like his old one — this room was tiny. It had the gas vents up near the ceiling, and a large TV built into the wall, but no windows.

Wait. No windows? There were _no fucking windows in here!_ He couldn't see his brothers anymore!

In a near-panic, Raph got to his feet and checked the adjoining room, but as he had suspected, it was only a bathroom. It just had a toilet and a shower that didn't even have an enclosure around it, just a drain in the tiled floor.

He went back out to look at the room again. It was almost completely empty, with only a blanket, toilet paper, bottled water, and a box of granola bars in a pile on the floor. Lots of bottles of water, and not very many granola bars. Shit... they were going to starve him, weren't they?

With his teeth gritted in frustration, he raised his eyes to the TV in the wall. It looked completely out of place in this cell of a room. Raph took that as an invitation to trash it.

But Raph had nothing other than his already-battered fists to hit it with, and the screen seemed to be shatter resistant. It was too high in the wall for him to slam his shell into it. There were no buttons or remote to break, either. Even when it became clear that it wouldn't break easily, Raph kept trying... because whoever had put him in here clearly wanted him to be in a room with a TV, and he knew he wasn't going to like whatever they were planning to show him on it.

It turned on suddenly and Raph took a few wary steps back from it. Then he realized what he was seeing. It was another room in this building, similar to the one he'd been in, and April and Casey were sitting together on the floor.

 _Oh for fuck's sake_ — had Casey been caught too? Raph had hoped that he might still be outside, planning a rescue mission. Casey had known where Raph and April had gone the night they'd vanished, as he'd been the one to get the lead about it in the fist place. Had he come back to rescue them, only to get his ass caught too? That _bonehead!_

But still, he and April both looked like they were ok. Unexpectedly, Raph realized just how much he'd missed them. The feeling washed over him. God — _he missed everybody so much_.

Their room had a TV in it also, and it flickered on. April and Casey both looked up at it in surprise. Raph watched too, warily. He could see their screen perfectly, as well as their reactions to it. 

A video began to play on the screen in front of April and Casey, and Raph saw himself in his old room, sitting on the floor by the glass. It was dark, but the image was clear. Raph was illuminated by the bluish-greenish glow that always filtered in through the water at night. All three of his brothers were on the other side of the glass, pressed up against it, staring in at him. As they tread water, the movement of their legs cast indistinct shadows across Raph.

April made a little distressed sound at the expression of pain and longing on Raph's face in the video. Casey took her hand without a word.

 _Shit_. Raph hadn't known there was a camera in his room. He hadn't even thought about the fact that maybe he was being watched... being recorded. Seeing himself like that, looking so defeated... He'd been miserable since he'd gotten here, and he'd felt so alone and confused. Now that he could see the look on his face from an outside perspective, it felt even worse. He looked so young, and even more naked than his brothers.

And then, all at once, something clicked and Raph remembered _exactly which day that was_. It was the first time he'd given in to the temptation and... April and Casey were going to see... Raph lunged forward, banging on the screen again. "No. No! That's not fair! _Goddammit, that's not fair!_ " But what could he even do? He couldn't stop it!

The Raph in the recording stood up and pressed his hands against the window. He slumped forward against it, looking sad. Just seeing it brought all the feelings back, like a knife in Raph's heart. His brothers, on the other side of the glass, mirrored him, touching the glass where Raph was touching it and stroking as if they could touch him through it. And then, on the screen, Raph spat in his palm and started jacking off to his brothers.

Casey jumped back, yelling, "Ew! Raph!" while April put her hand to her mouth in shock.

The volume was turned up loud — _so loud_ that Raph could hear the wet sounds his hand made on himself and every panting breath. And then, Raph stared in horror at himself coming on the glass, swearing and _groaning his brothers' names_. Even with his hands over his ears, Raph could still hear everything. Oh _fuck,_ he hadn't even realized he'd done that! And — oh god, _had he really finished so quick?_ Raph's face burned. He'd been so, _so_ turned on by his brothers.

"Jesus, that's messed up!" Casey said.

April seemed to be stunned, frozen where she was, watching.

On the screen, Mikey — oh fuck, _Mikey_ — licked the glass where Raph had left white streaks. He hadn't actually noticed that happen at the time, as he'd collapsed on his knees, trying to catch his breath.

The video didn't stop there, but it cut to another scene. Raph in the same spot on another day, with his brothers, hovering there like ghosts against the glass. Raph didn't know what exactly was going to happen. The time he'd spent there had all started to run together in his mind, but he knew that all there was to see was him jerking off some more or going into rages, and he didn't want to see either one. He couldn't stand the thought of Casey and April seeing _any of it_.

Raph retreated to the only place he could go — the bathroom. He didn't even have a bathtub to lie anymore, so he curled up on the floor. There was no door, so he could hear what was happening in the video perfectly. And when his recorded screams from one of his rages began, Raph turned on the shower and put his head under it in an attempt to drown out the sounds. The water was so cold it stung, but it didn't matter.

Oh god — why had he been so stupid — why hadn't he realized there would be a camera somewhere? They were probably watching him even now. They were probably enjoying watching what they had done to him!

How could he ever — _ever_ — look April or Casey in the eye again? If they all somehow got out of here (and that seemed pretty fucking unlikely now that they no longer had any friends on the outside), how could he talk to them and eat meals with them and do normal stuff after they'd seen this? Every dark, secret, perverted part of himself was on display for them to see. Raph curled into a tighter ball. He pressed his forehead to his knees.

It had been embarrassing enough knowing that April had been able to see what his brothers were doing, but they at least had the excuse of being drugged. Raph had no excuse. He was just fucked up. _Really fucked up_. Because even now, he wanted to be able to watch his brothers. He still wanted to be put in the tank with them, to be included in the things they did.

...

Raph had no idea how much time had passed. It was probably impossible to sleep with that much freezing water raining down on your head, but he felt like he'd been checked out for a while. He was uncomfortable, shivering from the cold, and the bandages on his hands were soggy and disgusting.

He sat up. There were still noises coming from the TV. " _Leo?_ " Raph's recorded voice asked, hoarsely. The sound was hollow and distorted. Then a moment later, he heard Mikey grunting and humming with pleasure, followed the wet sounds of their mouths. The time they'd put Mikey in Raph's room and they'd almost...

Raph ripped the tape and gauze off of his hands and threw it all aside. They looked like he'd stuck them in a blender and turned it on.

" _Yes. Yes. Do it, Mikey. Fucking do me._ "

There were stitches in some of the deeper cuts. Raph ripped them out with his teeth. He'd be damned before he'd accept his captor's help. 

" _Oh God, get on with it, Mikey. Fuck me. Fuck me, already!_ "

Some of the cuts opened and started bleeding again. But that was fine. He didn't care anymore. He'd rather let them heal by themselves. They hurt like a son of a bitch and they'd probably scar, but he'd earned them trying to fight back and escape, and so he'd wear them like a fucking gold medal.


	7. Red and Gray

There was no way to tell how many days passed in that room. The TV continued to show April and Casey's room with the video of Raph playing over and over. _Raph's Greatest Hits_ , Raph thought tiredly, as it looped for about the hundredth time.

"Goddam, does your movie suck," Raph complained toward the ceiling. There had to be a camera up there somewhere — he just couldn't figure out where. Talking to it, alternating between threats and sarcastic complaints, was the only thing keeping him sane. "Needs some fights, some explosions. A badass old cop a day away from retirement. Maybe a talking dog."

Eventually, while Raph was sleeping, the video changed. It didn't show April and Casey's room anymore — now it was just images from the vivarium. The sandy beach, the clear blue water, Leo's rock... only his brothers weren't there. No one was.

At first, Raph panicked, thinking his brothers had been taken somewhere else, maybe separated from each other and put into window-less rooms like this one, or _worse_. Then he realized it didn't mean a damn thing. They were just messing with him. There was no proof that it was live footage — it could have been shot at any time, even before his brothers were brought here. Anyway, it was better than listening to himself scream or whack off.

Now that he knew he was being watched and recorded, Raph tried not to show even a second of weakness. He wouldn't give them the satisfaction of providing any juicy new scenes for _Raph's Greatest Hits Part 2_. But it was hard, so hard, to not have a complete meltdown. He was alone here, and so bored. He couldn't even exercise, because he didn't have enough food. He couldn't waste any energy. He was losing muscle — all those years of working out, and it was all lost. He ate only when he couldn't stand the dizziness and weakness from hunger, and spent most of his time lying on the floor.

Being weak from hunger wasn't all bad, though. It helped him check out mentally. He went to a gray kind of place where he couldn't feel his body anymore, something between being awake and asleep.

But when he did sleep, he had the most vivid dreams of his life, and they were all about his brothers. They were full of conversations and complicated problems they took care of. And sex, of course. He wasn't masturbating anymore because of the cameras, so instead he had plenty of wet dreams.

"There's another clip for Youtube," he told the ceiling, after waking from another one.

When he had only one granola bar left (and the temptation to eat it was wearing him down), Raph wondered what was going to happen to him. They wouldn't let him die, would they? Maybe they'd give him more food, but it would always be in small amounts. Never enough, so he'd always be on the edge of starvation... 

God, he didn't even know who he was anymore. Who was this broken thing, lying on the floor, all the fight gone out of him? Light-headed from hunger, Raph stared at the healing wounds on his hands. Red — bright red, like fire, like blood, that used to be him. But they had scabbed over and dulled. Some had already closed, with shiny, new raised skin. He'd lost that red color... he was...

When Raph woke up, he was in a different room, feeling sick and disoriented from being gassed again.

April was sitting on the floor next to him. If he'd had the energy, he would have backpedaled away from her. He stared at her with a confusing combination of relief, surprise, and horror. He didn't want to have to face her, after what she'd seen. He didn't want to have to talk to her.

"Raph?"

Raph stubbornly pretended to still be asleep, but April seemed to know better. 

"Listen. I've had a lot of time to think about things. And all this — it's about shame. Humiliation."

Raph curled in on himself even tighter. What was she saying? Couldn't she see how fucked up he was? Being in here, the things that were happening — they were just bringing the uglier parts of Raph to light. You couldn't blame the situation for everything.

"That's all it is," April said, slowly. "And, well... we can't change how things are, only how we react to them. We can decide not to be ashamed —" April cut off mid-sentence with a gasp, then a scream.

Raph's body went into fight-or-flight mode. He turned to see what was happening to her —

A hand — a green, three-fingered hand — reached down from above and grasped her chin, turning her face. _Donnie_. Donnie was standing over April, exposed and hard, staring down at her curiously.

"Donnie!" She gasped, sounding panicky, as he knelt and touched her face with a tender expression.

"Don! Donnie, stop it!" Raph said, his voice raspy. He got up onto his elbows, but the movement made his head spin. Up, down, left, right — he couldn't tell them apart, and sunk back onto the floor, facedown.

When Raph opened his eyes again, Donnie was kneeling next to him. His eyes were focused on Raph, but his expression was blank. Clearly he was still drugged.

April scrambled to her feet and backed up, against the wall. Then she gasped out, "Oh my god — _Leo!_ "

_Leo?!_

Strong hands grasped Raph by the shell and rolled him over onto his back, and there was Leo, staring down at him.

Where had they been hiding? Was Mikey here too? Raph scanned the room quickly, but didn't see anyone else. Leo petted Raph's plastron and Donnie moved in closer with an eager grunt. Raph knew exactly what they wanted.

"Raph!" April cried, her eyes wide. "What do we do?"

"Nothing! April — you — you let them have their way with me and don't draw attention to yourself! You hear me?" Raph said, as his brothers pawed at him.

"But —" She opened her mouth like she wanted to say something else, then hesitated.

"April! It — it should be me —" Raph cut himself off with a surprised grunt at the sensation of Leo grabbing his legs and spreading them. He squeezed his eyes shut — _oh fuck, was this really happening?_ — as Donnie slipped a finger into his cloaca, coaxing his cock out. It didn't take much. Raph was already hard. Oh. _Why did this have to happen with April in the room?!_

"Look away," Raph begged, as Donnie started stroking him. "April — look away! Don't listen!"

Raph opened his eyes in surprise when Leo let go of his legs, and was just in time to see Leo getting down onto all fours in a submissive position. Not much could have distracted him from what Donnie was doing to him... but Raph had to see this.

Leo turned so that he was facing away, then raised his rear high, and crawled backwards toward Raph in a posture of offering himself up. Raph could see _everything_ — Leo's ass, his hard dick, the slit of his cloaca... Raph reached forward and touched it, opening it slightly. Leo looked back over his shoulder and let out a breathy moan. _Oh those ridges on the inside — how those must feel_. Raph's cock jumped in Donnie's hand. Leo like this had to be the most amazing thing he'd ever seen.

He was going to get to fuck Leo. _He was going to get to fuck Leo!_ He didn't care that April was there, or about the cameras, or anything else. _Just please let this happen._

But Donnie pushed Raph back onto his shell on the floor, then rolled his weight forward on Raph. "No, Donnie! Goddam it, Donnie!" Raph gasped in frustration.

Donnie pushed Raph's knees up toward his shoulders and thrust into him, just like that. It was so abrupt, and not what he was expecting at all. It didn't hurt, but it was a strange sensation. And Donnie was rough — not giving Raph time to adjust or get into a more comfortable position.

But it was Donnie — he was with his brothers again — _relief pleasure shame fear belonging humiliation guilt love —_

And Leo was there, right there, sitting next to Raph, stroking his face and watching everything, his cock jutting out from under his plastron.

Looking up, Raph saw his own calves and feet pointed at the ceiling where Donnie was holding them. Donnie was unashamedly moaning with pleasure, his mouth quivering and his eyes widening at each sensation, so unlike the brother Raph remembered from before all of this happened.

Somewhere up there on the ceiling there had to be a hidden camera. Fuck — of course they were watching this. Watching and enjoying and waiting to gas them again and move them on to the next room. Maybe they were even wondering if Raph hadn't fought because he'd secretly wanted this. Maybe they had seen his face when he'd thought he'd get to fuck Leo...

Raph could have fought. Shit — he hadn't even tried. And saying that he was doing this to protect April from his brothers... well, it wasn't exactly a lie, but it had been very convenient...

No — no, the truth was that this had been forced on them, on all of them, no matter how twisted Raph was deep inside. The thought set Raph off, like a rage taking him. "Yeah, you're watching this, you sick fuckers. Watching it and getting off on it, aren't ya?" Raph shouted at the ceiling. Donnie gave him a questioning look without slowing down at all. "You sick bastards. I'm going to kill you! I'm going to kill every one of you when I get out of here, do you hear me?!"

Leo reached between them and wrapped his hand around Raph's cock, while he stroked himself with his other hand. "Fuck, oh fuck!" Raph shouted, and his rant turned into nonsense, the words and emotions coming out confused. Because oh. It was amazing, and he was with his brothers again, not sitting in that room all alone anymore, and they loved him and wanted him and — the way Leo was stroking him was unbelievably perfect. Raph couldn't have done it better himself.

Raph squeezed his eyes shut and turned his head from side to side, overwhelmed, wanting an escape. Donnie thrusting into him — all too much — _so, so much_ — and Raph came in Leo's hand with a shout. His mind shut down and and everything else seemed to fade away.

He snapped out of his haze when Leo let out a keening groan and came, hot, across Raph's shoulder and plastron. There, for a second, was a flash of something like the old Leo in his eyes. Raph watched his face intently, as he caught his breath and the calm, blank expression returned.

Donnie let out a long, hoarse shout, a primitive cry as he came, which subsided to quieter moans and panting and he put his whole weight down on Raph, holding him almost tenderly and thrusting slowly through the end of his climax. Raph stroked his shell until Donnie relaxed fully.

"Get off me Donnie — get off," Raph said. He nudged him and Donnie got the picture, rolling lazily off to the side. Raph finally straightened his aching legs, wincing at the hot fluid that came out of his cloaca when he did.

Leo, on his other side, twined their legs together. Donnie, still out of breath, kissed Raph's cheek. Raph tilted his head and let Donnie kiss his mouth, then turned the other way so Leo could. If they remembered this later — that they had forced themselves on him — he wanted them to know that Raph didn't blame them. He didn't hate them for it. He loved them.

As much as he'd like to just lay there and enjoy being together with them again, April was still in the room. And they were still being watched. It was inevitable what would happen, and waiting for it was putting him on edge.

"Just gas us," Raph muttered. "Come on what are you waiting for. Just gas us already. Come on."

And then the darkness returned.


	8. Manipulation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've had some really bad writer's block recently. Sorry to those of you who were waiting for this chapter.

Raphael was in the lair, checking his brothers' beds one by one. Empty. Empty. _Empty._ Dammit, where were they?

He could hear muffled voices all around him, but he couldn't find where they were coming from. Sometimes it sounded like they were calling his name. He knew it was his brothers — it had to be his brothers — but Raph couldn't hear them right. He couldn't tell their voices apart. Wait... did he even remember what they sounded like?

...

Raph slowly drifted awake. He'd been dreaming for a long, long time and was surprised to find himself back in reality.

Huh? He was lying on a mattress... was this a new room? Weak and dizzy, he struggled to sit up. He scanned the room. No one was there (although someone had been calling his name, hadn't they?) but —

The room had a window!

He scrambled his way to it on his hands and knees and saw the vivarium from a different angle than he ever had before. This room was higher. He was several stories higher than the island, looking down on it. His brothers wouldn't be able to swim right up to his window and look in at him like before — they might not even be able to see him at all, way up here.

But _Raph could see his brothers again_ — all three of them, alive and safe, playing in the shallow water on the edge of the island as if they didn't have any worries or concerns. Like they didn't even know — or didn't _care_ — they were trapped.

Still on his hands and knees, Raph let himself slump forward until his forehead rested against the glass and just watched them. He had no fucking clue what he was feeling — it was too many feelings all at once to actually be able to tell what they were — but he knew for sure that he was really glad to see them alive, especially Mikey who hadn't been with Don and Leo the last time he'd seen them.

He wasn't even sure how long he sat there. It took Raph a long time to get his breathing under control again. By then, he was so tired he was shaking. Just from _sitting there_ and feeling all those strong emotions. He was so weak these days from not eating enough. It was fucking _pathetic_.

His brothers were stretched out on the sand, resting now. Making sure they were alright one last time, Raph turned away at last to check out the room. Just like the first room he'd been locked in, there were stacks of supplies against the wall. Bottled water, toilet paper, and food. _Plenty of food_.

Raph tried to stand but stumbled, so instead he crawled to it. He ripped open a box of energy bars and began to eat furiously. He was fumbling with the wrapper on the fourth one when his stomach clenched painfully and he hunched forward and gagged.

Somehow he managed to keep it down. He sat and breathed slowly for a while, and sipped at some water. His body was so screwed up now. God, he was weak. He was a goddam mess. His captor was probably watching him make a fool of himself and laughing. He probably got off on it that Raph was _so happy_ to be in a room like this, to be able to watch his brothers again, to eat the crappy food they gave him. _Shit._

Raph sat, back leaning against the 48-roll pack of toilet paper (what if he was here long enough to actually use all of that?) and stared blankly at the ceiling. What if they put him through this over and over — starving him, then giving him food again, not letting him see his brothers, then giving him a window to watch them through. What if Raph _never_ found a way out? How long had it even been since he'd been captured? He didn't have a clue.

Now that it all had time to sink in, Raph was pissed off at himself for being so desperate to eat this crappy food again, and especially so happy to see his brothers again. They were still stuck here. They were all prisoners in here. And his brothers were drugged out of their minds, not even acting like themselves, and Raph was _glad to see them_?

Fuck, he'd been manipulated — into actually being happy about being in one of their slightly-better rooms, watching his brothers through a window. And his captors could take any of it away from him at any time. He hands clenched into tight fists, pulling at the scars, but he didn't go into one of his out-of-control rages. He didn't have it in him to do that anymore.

...

Over the next several days, when Raph wasn't watching his brothers (which he did for hours every day) he worked at building his strength up. He tried to be cautious about it — but caution was _not_ something he was good at. He ate as much as his stomach could handle and exercised lightly, then rested. If he could just get stronger and put on some muscle, he'd be able to fight...

But fight _what?_ Fight _who?_

What was the point?

...

Raph sat in the window, watching his brothers intently. They didn't seem to be able to see him up here. In all the time he'd sat here, they'd never once looked up at him. He bitterly missed his old room, where they could come right up against the glass. They could each press up against it, and it was almost like touching... Now his brothers were further away than ever.

Leo was lying on the sandy beach lazily, nodding off. Mikey swam up to the shore and went over to him, but when Leo didn't open his eyes, Mike poked him with his toe. Leo responded to that by giving Mikey a lazy look, then rolled over sleepily, turning his back to him.

Provoked, Mike jumped on Leo, tickling him. But when Leo jerked up into a sitting position and tried to push him away, Mike scrambled to his feet to run away — but not before Leo slapped his ass playfully. Mikey ran across the sandy beach with Leo chasing after him.

Watching them, taking it all in, was Raph's only lifeline, and so he noticed every detail — Don looking up curiously, the sand flying up from their feet as they ran, their teeth flashing as they laughed. Leo laughing. And being _playful_.

Mikey nearly collided with Don as he looped around the beach. He swerved and slipped, landing on all fours in the sand. Don seized the opportunity and tackled him, then held him down. Leo caught up a moment later, falling to his knees beside them and holding Mikey's kicking legs.

They were pinning him down sloppily. They all knew how to get out of something like that — they'd practiced it a million times. Which meant that Mikey didn't really want to, and all of his struggling and flailing (and shouting, although Raph couldn't hear anything through the glass) was just part of the game. Part of their... foreplay...

They'd played like this when they were kids. Not a lot, but sometimes. But this now was undoubtedly sexual...

Since he'd been locked up in here, Raph's eyes had been opened in so many ways.

Don, now sitting on Mikey's shell, leaned down close to his face. It — it almost looked like he was whispering something to Mikey — but no, they didn't talk. They _couldn't_ talk, because of the drugs. It had to be something else — Don was probably looking for a kiss.

Then Leo sneak-attacked Don and pushed him down onto the sand next to Mikey. Raph caught a glimpse of Don's shocked face as he fell. Mikey rolled onto his side, his mouth open and eyes screwed shut as he laughed.

Leo... Leo was happy here, happy like this. Before they came here, how long had it been since Leo had looked so free?

And Raph — Raph was _miserable_. He wanted to have fun with his brothers. He wanted to not have to think or worry. No, he wanted to _fight!_ He didn't want to be in a cage with them like a fucking zoo animal. He didn't want to be mindlessly happy while someone else had complete control over him, but still... _still_... he just wanted to be with his brothers. He didn't want to suffer like this anymore. Why was he the only one who wasn't with them?

Raph stared at the scars on his hands. He'd punched his way through the wall of his old room in a frenzy, but what had he been trying to get to? Freedom? But he wouldn't have been able to rescue anyone, not by himself, not with the kind of security they had here, so freedom would mean going back to the lair alone, without his brothers, without even April and Casey. That wasn't what he wanted at all. Maybe he'd _really_ been trying to find a way into the vivarium.

If he had to choose between a door to the outside world and a door to the vivarium, which one would he pick?

...

Raph didn't remember falling asleep, but he woke up feeling disoriented. So they'd gassed him again. That was getting to be normal, these days.

But something was different this time. He smelled it first — the smell was strange. The air felt different. He rolled over and the floor lurched under him — but it wasn't just from dizziness this time. The floor was actually moving.

He opened his eyes to the confusing sight of metal bars under him and a huge drop below. Panicked, Raph grabbed the only solid thing — the bars — but that just made the floor move even more. No wait — it wasn't just the floor — Raph was _swinging_ with it.

He was in a cage suspended over the vivarium. He'd seen cages like this one on _Shark Week_. They put divers in them to protect them from sharks when they lowered them into the water.

Raph closed his eyes and fought motion sickness for a moment before he could look again. When his eyes focused he saw more detail. Below was the island, the waterfall, and the surface of the water. He recognized the smell of the water — it had been clinging to his brothers on each of the brief times he'd been allowed to see them. Above him were the walkway and catwalks and rows of lights that crisscrossed over the vivarium.

He'd seen this cage before. They had used it when they put humans in the vivarium as punishment, but Raph had never seen them just hang somebody in midair like this before. It was tall enough to stand up in, but too narrow to lie down and stretch out. The bars were widely spaced. He could get his arms and legs between them, but he couldn't slip out.

Were they going to lower him down and let him loose?

Was he finally going to join his brothers in the vivarium?


	9. Caged

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My head has been in a weird place and I couldn't write. Thanks for waiting for so long for this chapter.

Slowly, the cage was lowered down toward the water.

The strange smell got stronger and stronger. It didn't smell like anything natural — was it the smell of the drug?

Raph's brothers noticed the cage. They came out into the water to meet it — and that was when Raph realized that the cage wasn't going to land on the island, but in the water. If it went under — well, he could hold his breath for a long time — he was a turtle, after all — but not forever.

"Shit." Panicking, Raph rattled the bars.

When it got low enough, the other three turtles clambered around sides of the cage and reached inside. Raph felt like a rock star, swarmed by frenzied fans who just wanted to touch him. But Raph didn't have time to think about that — the water was already over his knees and rising. Raph grabbed the bars and pulled himself as far up as he could and started breathing hard, trying to oxygenate his blood before going under.

Would his brothers, in their drugged state, be able to realize that Raph was in danger of drowning? Would they try to hold the cage up? Even if they tried, would it be too heavy? Shit, why would their captors put Raph in here just to drown him? Raph wondered all of this as the water rose and the fast breathing made him feel dizzy and... really strange.

Or was something else causing that? Drugs — in the air, in the water? Was he being affected by whatever made his brothers act the way they acted?

Their hands closed around the edges of his plastron and pulled him forward, against the bars of the cage. Their hands groped at him. A finger slid into him.

"Guys — not now. Not _now!_ " he grumbled. They wanted to fuck and he wanted to — _not drown_. "Back off a minute!" he snapped, for all the good it did. Mike responded by clinging to the side of the cage and thrusting his cock between the bars against Raph's thigh. "Typical," Raph muttered. He should have expected this by now.

It was hard to tell with the cage swinging around from his brothers' movements, but it seemed like it wasn't being lowered any more. He had about a foot of air left at the top, but he didn't exactly feel safe. If the cable was cut or snapped or anyone decided to lower it further, this heavy metal cage sure would't float. It'd take Raph straight to the bottom and he'd drown with his brothers trying to fuck him through the bars.

"Don't suppose you guys can bust me out of here?" Raph asked. He didn't expect any sort of a reply, and he didn't get one. His brothers only had one thing on their minds. Don ducked under the water to grasp Raph's thighs and pull his cock out. Aggressively, Leo reached in and grasped the back of Raph's head and pulled him forward into a clumsy kiss around the metal bars. It hurt a little but... _Leo._

He was with them. He wasn't alone in his room. This wasn't a fantasy. He was really with them.

He couldn't escape, could't save himself, didn't have the strength to smash his way out of a fucking _shark cage_. He was at the whim of whoever was in control here. And... and it didn't matter. He could uselessly beat his fists black and blue on the bars, or he could just let this play out.

Anyway, it was hard to think. He was lightheaded, and it was nice. His brothers were urging him on, and so... and so...

His fear was gone. Trusting that he would still be able to get to the air when he needed it, Raph let go of the bars and sank underwater. The outside sounds were muffled. The simulated sunlight was softened. He liked the way his brothers looked. They clung to the sides of the cage, urging Raph with their hands, but not forcing him.

Raph knew people were watching from the windows, but... they seemed so far away. The reasons for not putting on a show for them seemed to fade away. _Fuck_ , they'd seen it all already. Raph was here with his brothers right now. His brothers, who he loved, who he had always loved. Who needed him. Who wanted him.

Three cocks through the bars of the cage. Holding his breath, Raph took one in each hand, and leaned forward to take the third in his mouth.

He hadn't done this before but it felt... it felt kind of right in his mouth. He moved his head, sliding his lips along its length. He forgot to stroke the two in his hands, but they took care of it by thrusting into his fists. He hadn't expected to hear the muffled sounds of pleasure through the water, but he did. The cage swayed gently. For the first time in what felt like forever, Raph forgot that he was a prisoner.

One of his brothers managed to move, to shift down and pull Raph forward, until the head of Raph's cock touched the metal bars. They guided him forward and the sensation of water around his cock was replaced by the sensation of a mouth around it.

Everything had taken on a dreamy quality. Far away and yet... his brothers were here, right here. Time no longer seemed to be passing. The cage rocked, the light seemed to ripple over them, and all Raph knew was pleasure.

It was disappointing when his brothers pulled away all at once. Raph surfaced and watched, confused. He couldn't seem to actually ask any questions. The words wouldn't come out. He only made whimpering sounds while Donatello fiddled with the edge of the cage — why, _why_ was he touching that and not Raph?

There was a creak of metal and his brothers were pulling away a whole side of the cage. Oh! Raph understood now! He could reach them without the metal between them! They guided him out of the cage and oh, the water just went on forever all around him and below him, and the space over their heads was so big and there were so many windows watching and —

They climbed up onto the top of the cage. That seemed silly. The water felt so good and the island would make a better place for a good, hard fuck. He had a vague feeling he'd seen them do that there before, lots and lots of times. Shit, it was getting hard to think and Raph didn't know why. So why were they going up there? One of them (his name...? He had a name and Raph knew it, he just couldn't quite...) reached down and pulled him up, until he stood on top of the wobbly cage. His other two brothers were already shimmying up the chain that connected the cage to the catwalk.

Raph grasped the chain and tried to climb it, like they were doing, but he couldn't seem to make it work.

"Woah, hold on, Raphie." His brother put a hand on Raph's shoulder. "Relax. There's going to be an easier way... I hope."

Raph liked it that his brother was paying attention to him, even if he didn't understand the words. Nobody had said words to him in a long time. Raph had shouted a lot of them when he was alone in his room, but he coudln't really remember what he'd said. He leaned against his brother, nuzzling at his neck. God, Raph felt amazing right now.

"I hope you can still remember how to fight, because we're going to have to, and soon," his brother said, putting something heavy into Raph's hand. Raph stared at it, sure he'd never held anything like it before. It was wood, and parts of it were worn smooth but other parts were jagged. Natural-looking.

The cage began moving upwards then, taking them up and out of the vivarium.

And all Raph remembered after that felt like an endless dream. A blur of noise and color, touch, texture, and Raph's heart beating so hard as his blood throbbed in his veins. The floor felt funny under his feet. Strange faces and voices. Explosive violence, delivered by his own hands. Satisfaction.

And pain. Confusion. Human hands on him. And then, darkness.


	10. An Incomplete Escape

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for all the comments and support for this fic. :)

Raph woke up in a dark room. He was groggy and he couldn't even move. He could barely open his eyes.

In a haze, he wondered where he was. Locked in another room? No... no, this was something different. The air was cool and comfortable, and the sounds were familiar. It was ok. Something had changed. Something had ended.

...

"You sure you guys are alright?" A voice floated in to Raph from somewhere else.

"Yeah. Maybe we should have taken you home first. If Raph could move under his own steam, we would have." That was his brother's voice. _Leo. Leo's voice._ Raph wasn't really alert enough to understand the words, but some of the meaning filtered through to his brain, slow and delayed. But mostly Raph could hear how exhausted and lost Leo sounded.

"No, we're ok." A higher voice. April. They weren't in the room with Raph, but out in a hallway, trying to keep their voices low so they wouldn't disturb him. Raph wanted to go join them, but moving was too hard. Impossible, probably. Anyway, there was something comforting about lying here listening to them.

April continued, "It was more important to get you home. Anyway, by now someone will have reported us missing, and we have no idea what we'll be going back to when we try to go home ourselves. Probably a lot of difficult questions and red tape." She sighed. "It's nothing you guys could help us with."

"But — it's been months. What if your apartments have been rented out? What if you don't have a place to sleep tonight?" Leo asked, sounding worried. Without even being able to see his face, Raph knew that the carefree Leo from the vivarium was gone. He wasn't even the old Leo with his walls and ironclad self-control. This Leo was different... broken...

"Hey, don't worry about us, Leo." Casey's voice. "We had time to come up with a cover story while we were in there. And whatever else happens, we can deal with it."

"Oh. Well. Alright. Let us know how it goes," Leo said. "And... and I'm sorry that you had to get involved. I'm so sorry, for all of it, that you had to — to see —"

"We're fine. We just need to go get our lives sorted back out."

Raph heard a door close. April and Casey had left.

"Don't we all," Leo said to himself, softly.

...

They were home, back in the lair. Raph realized it slowly as he drifted in and out of awareness. That meant they had privacy now that they were out of that place, so now they could... there was no glass wall between them, no metal bars limiting what they could do. He could finally join in with his brothers, freely.

Raph struggled to stand up. It took forever. The covers were so heavy and they clung to him. His feet and legs were numb and felt far away, but somehow he got to his feet, still wrapped up like a mummy, and he struggled clumsily through the lair. It was quiet and the only sounds were faint, but he followed them until he found his brothers in the kitchen. They were trying to make dinner out of the few things left that hadn't gone bad while they were away.

They weren't talking to each other. Or helping each other, or making eye contact at all.

But still it felt so good to see them. So amazing to be near them, to be able to touch them — oh God there was nothing he wanted more —

Raph tried to say something, but it came out as a grunt. He slipped sideways, his shell banging against the wall.

"Raph?" His brothers looked up at him, eyes wide. Afraid of him? Embarrassed by him? Shocked? Raph couldn't tell. He couldn't even put out his hand to steady himself. He looked down, confused to find that his body wasn't twisted up in sheets like he'd thought it was, but was actually wrapped up in thick, buckled straps and heavy cloth, pinning his arms to his sides.

"Woah, woah, Raph. Easy," Mike said, steadying him from one side while Don took the other.

They walked him back to bed. He was sure they'd unwrap him and climb in with him — after all this _waiting_ , and how exciting it was to just be this close to them — but they didn't. With soothing words that Raph didn't understand, they put the covers back over him and left, shutting the door behind them.

Raph lay in a twilight state of drowsy fantasies and confused longing, his brothers filling his mind until he thought he might burst. He _wanted_ them, and they were there — he could hear the sounds they were making faintly, familiar homey sounds of eating dinner and washing dishes. So close, and yet still far, still separate from him.

And yet it sounded all wrong still, because never once did he hear them talking to each other. Or laugh or argue or shout or _anything_ normal.

Eventually, they brought him food and tried to feed him, but Raph had little interest and only managed a few mouthfuls. He fought to get free. Fought to get to them.

They recoiled and backed away. And after staring at him, confused and conflicted, as Raph grunted and struggled against the straps, they left.

The stripe of light under his door disappeared and the lair went completely silent. 

...

"Raph. It's me, Leo. I'm coming in."

Leo came in and sat on the foot of Raph's bed. He had turned on a light in the hall, but none in Raph's room, so he was backlit and shadowy. It was still the middle of the night, Raph could tell. It had only been a few hours.

"Are you any better? Can you talk yet?" Leo asked.

It took a moment to make sense of the words. Raph managed a guttural sound in response.

"Guess not. Anyway... just seeing if you need anything."

_Yeah. You._

"Water? More food? You lost a lot of weight in the— recently."

Raph shook his head, jerkily.

"You're still recovering from the drug. It — it makes you feel really weird. And, well, we're not sure how long it will last. So, for now, it's better if we keep you restrained. For your own good..." Leo trailed off and fell silent, meditative.

"Leo?" Mike asked from the door, Don appearing, blinking blearily, from the opposite side.

"Oh! Sorry. Just checking on him. Didn't mean to wake everybody up." Leo sounded flustered.

Raph wiggled up into a sitting position. It was difficult with his arms still strapped down. He struggled to free himself.

"I hate seeing him like this," Leo said.

"I know, but what else can we do?" Don asked.

Leo stared at Raph for a moment. "We could let him loose."

"Leo..."

Leo shook his head. "It's not like he's dangerous. He doesn't want to _hurt_ us."

Raph's heart leapt. Was Leo going to let him loose?

"But he'll—" Mike began, as Don said, "There's only one thing he wants from us right—"

Leo held up his hands. "I know, I know. It's just — I don't know about you, but I remember how it felt, being separated from _him_ and unable to reach him, watching him through the glass. My memories are mostly hazy, but that feeling..."

"Yeah," Mike said, simply.

"He went through the whole thing alone, and we had each other the whole time. And now we've got him tied up here, alone."

"Leo," Don pressed his fist to his mouth as he spoke, clearly embarrassed. "We can't because _he can't consent_. He's still under the influence of the drug and he simply can't understand the situation well enough to consent. Even if he's the one initiating — uh — things. And... and it's not like before. We don't have an excuse."

There was a long uncomfortable pause where no one looked at each other. Raph hadn't understood most of what Don said, except that the bottom line was no.

Leo stood up, the bedsprings creaking. "Yeah. Of course. It's probably best if we let him sleep it off."

No. Didn't his brothers want him? Didn't they care?

They left the room, closing the door behind them and shutting off the hall light.

Raph's head seemed to throb, harder and harder, as he tried to call for them to come back. He struggled against the straps and shouted harder and then all at once he was fully into one of his rages. He threw himself out of bed and onto the floor, then screamed and struggled until he was exhausted.


End file.
